I want to hit something, I want to break something. I'm reading Faulkner, As I Lay Dying, right now for a class. It's hard to read at times, accents and such, but it's good. It's better than good. I can write like this. I know I can. What makes it so good? What does Faulkner have that I don't? I'll fight him over this. No I won't, I haven't got the strength or nerve. I want to write, I want to be wonderful. My original stuff lags, my fan stuff dies. I write for myself, I write for other people. I lose heart when I lose other people because I use them, I use others for support. Writing brings a relief, but with without recognition it's all just masturbation. I want to be shared. For the next few hours I pledge to write. I will write and I will not be stopped. I will post.